Time is very popular. You can tell by how many familiar sayings there are about time. You know, like, time heals all wounds, time will tell, the time is now, what time is it? O.K., maybe not the last one. But you get my point.
We all know how valuable time is, yet many of us refuse to truly honor time and honor the importance time can have for our physical and emotional health, especially as we get long in the tooth.
Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend. – Laertius Diogenes
We have to wrestle daily with the tug-‘o-war for our time. Between marriage, kids, work, school, volunteering, home repairs, celebrations, family obligations, and spiritual commitments, who’s got the time?
It’s difficult to manage our time and maintain some sense of a balanced life. And yet, if we don’t, who will take the time to do it for us? Correct, no one. That’s why it’s up to you. You must develop habits with your time that will nourish you, so that you can properly tend to your other loves and commitments.
Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you. – Carl Sandburg
If you don’t master that territory — how you allocate your time — others will do it for you. And when that happens, resentment soon follows. In other words, your time will be used to satisfy others’ needs, to the exclusion of your own, if you don’t take charge.
I want to focus your attention on a specific use of your precious time. And that is, time away with your buddies. By this I mean, an overnight or a weekend away.
For most men, a getaway like this tends to be the last thing on your list, if it’s even on your list. Why do you not take time away with the men in your life?
Is it be because:
How can you go about developing trusting relationships with the men in your life, or with men you’d like to include in your inner circle? Here’s a short list:
- she won’t let you,
- she’ll be upset or feel abandoned,
- she doesn’t go away with her friends,
- you have no friends,
- you feel guilty,
- you have no experience going on road trips with buddies,
- you’re just too busy,
- you’re afraid
- or is it because you automatically say, “Oh no, I can’t do that,” and have never taken the time to figure out why?
People who cannot find time for recreation are obliged sooner or later to find time for illness. – John Wanamaker
Having heard the struggles of men for over 20 years, all I can tell you is that you MUST take time to be with men, away from all other obligations. Only when we are completely disconnected from our daily commitments can we begin to have a healthy perspective on ourselves, our relationships, and on our various responsibilities.
Yes, you need and want to spend time with your wife, with couples, with your children, extended family, etc. But what happened to you? When did you forget that adventures with your friends could fill you with joy, reconnect you with passion, and recharge your batteries so that you could be the best man possible for everyone you care about?
I wasted time, and now time doth waste me. – William Shakespeare
Let me be very candid for a moment. As many of you men know, vacations with your wife and kids can sometimes feel like anything but a vacation.
When you have little ones, vacations are work. Now, it may be a labor of love, but you are on the clock. It’s impossible to totally recharge when you’re working. And as much as many of us adore our wives, we’ve had experiences where the energy required to take good care of them while traveling has interfered with our ability to completely relax and enjoy.
When we’re on an adventure with men we know and trust, whether it be to Joshua Tree, Vegas, an all-night poker-fest, a cycling trip, or backpacking, we’re free to remember who we are and what fires us up. It’s the connection with that energy that we so desperately need to be the best husbands, fathers and business leaders we can be.
Lost time is never found again. – Benjamin Franklin
Whatever obstacles, real or imagined, that are keeping you from connecting with men and honoring your masculinity by sharing these private adventures, are also preventing you from experiencing the depths of your own happiness, and the power you have to be a compassionate father, doting husband, and successful businessman.
The time for action is now. It’s never too late to do something. – Carl Sandburg
Indeed, Mr. Sandberg. And remember men, what happens with the men should stay with the men. This is how trust is built. But the impact of these experiences on you will benefit everyone you care about. Have a great time!
