Express, but Don’t Defend

November 19, 2023


BetterMen Tool No. 2: Express But Don’t Defend Your Feelings. This is from my book called Hold On to Your N.U.T.s. Express But Don’t Defend Your Feelings. It’s important for men to know how they feel, and it’s critical in a relationship to be able to communicate that with your partner. For many reasons, men are not connected to how they feel, and if they do know how they feel, they’re afraid, for any number of reasons, to communicate that—partially because they fear that what they say might upset their partner. And so mommy issues come up. They are afraid of getting into an argument because she may not like how he feels, because that might be impacting her life in a way that doesn’t suit her. Lots of details here.

Once you know how you feel, communicate it in a straightforward, loving way so that she understands. That’s step number one. Learning to express without defending is a tool worth looking into if you want to have a strong, loving relationship.