Sex is intimate. But intimacy involves a hell of a lot more than just sex. So men, if you want to have a loving, long-term, successful, relationship with your woman, then you need to understand where intimacy is showing up and where it’s not showing up.
Now, sex in your relationship is a good barometer as to whether there is adequate intimacy in your relationship, but it’s not the only thing. So generally speaking, men need to have sex to feel intimate, but women need to feel the intimacy before they’re wanting to have sex.
I write about this in my book Hold On to Your N.U.T.s: The Relationship Manual for Men. There are lots of things that men can do to bring intimacy into a relationship. Intimacy happens from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to bed. There are lots of opportunity, and it’s not all romantic and it’s not all sexual.
If you build that intimacy, and the relationship strengthens, then you will see that intimacy show up in your sex life. And I think you’ll both be much happier as a result.