Guilt is when you feel you’ve done something wrong. Shame is when you feel there’s something wrong with YOU!
What’s wrong with you? Go ahead, think about it. You may never have put it into words, but the thoughts have been there. Those thoughts have informed your decisions, your choices, your perspective on life, relationships, having fun, and parenting.
So, what is wrong with you? Are you not good enough, smart enough, sharp enough, motivated enough, sensitive enough, funny enough, successful enough, neat enough, talented enough, interesting enough, creative enough?
Whatever it is, you’ve been fighting those thoughts for a very long time. But what if they’re lies? What if it’s not true? What if you are enough? What if the only obstacle to being the man you want to be is the lie that separates you from the truth of who you really are? What if the shame you feel is a lie? What if there’s nothing wrong with you?
Guess what? There’s nothing wrong with you! You just have some work to do. You have some new tools to learn. You need to develop the vision of the man you want to be and get the support you need to make a few changes. It’s not always easy. But that doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you.
So, enough already with the shame. Make the commitment to change. And then get to work on being the man, husband and father you’ve always wanted to be. That’ll be enough.