Personal growth and development covers a wide range of specific topics, from health and fitness, finances, and grooming, to emotional and spiritual pursuits. How successful we are in focusing on our personal growth to be a better man is often times tied to the relationship with and the modeling we received from our father.
So much of who we are is a result of our early childhood experiences. Who we have become as men has everything to do with what Dad taught us or neglected to teach us. That’s why I’d like to talk about fathering as it pertains to personal growth coaching and how receiving the fathering you still crave is available and essential to your personal growth and development goals.
What is Personal Growth?
Being a better man is exactly what I help my clients to achieve as a one-on-one life coach for men at BetterMen Coaching. And I don’t think it’s a coincidence that even though I essentially grew up without a father (he died when I was nine), I have played the role of “father” for hundreds of men. Having searched for years for what I didn’t have as a kid, I eventually learned the skills I needed to be my own best father, while offering that same wisdom to other men in pursuit of personal growth.
Father energy is available to all men, even if you didn’t receive what you needed, or felt you needed, when you were a boy. I write specifically about the importance of fathering in my book Hold On to Your N.U.T.s — The Relationship Manual for Men. It’s a great resource for men who did not receive the relationship modeling necessary to know how to participate in a healthy long-term relationship—those men wonder, how to be a better man for my wife?
What I’ve found in working with men seeking personal growth coaching is that they’ve come to me after years of not feeling like a man. Because they didn’t have a healthy relationship with their dad, they not only didn’t receive their dad’s wisdom, but they grew to feel uncomfortable in the presence of other men and, as a result, are reluctant to ask men for help. Eventually, the discomfort grows intolerable, which then leads men to reach out to a personal growth coach or other professional.
Personal Growth Objectives
So, how exactly does this “fathering” actually happen in one-on-one coaching? Many times, a client is drawn energetically to me just through reading my website and watching some YouTube videos. Energy is a fascinating thing. It travels at the speed of light and affects everyone. The degree to which one is aware of that transmission varies from person to person. But it certainly is real. You may have experienced it yourself when some you were thinking about just moments ago decides to phone you. It’s not coincidental…it’s energetic.
Once the coaching process begins, a client will cycle through any number of emotions based on what he’s experiencing in his body. We’ll specifically discuss these effects so that he can become aware of how he is actually reacting to the conversation we’re having and its contents. For instance, a man may be aware that what I’m suggesting to him is exactly what his wife may have said to him many, many times in the past. But, for some reason, he’s receiving it in a very different way and is feeling more trusting of the input. This is that fathering energy at play, the masculine energy he missed as a boy and has been craving ever since.
Symbols of Personal Growth
As the trust between coach and client grows over time, and as the man puts into practice the solutions that are recommended for his various life challenges, he receives more and more fathering and, in time, actually begins to feel more and more like the man he wants to be. It’s a magical process that happens naturally when a man is committed to being a better man, integrates into his life new behaviors and perspectives, and begins to trust his gut. That is what it means to be a better man!
This is a quick overview of the process associated with fathering energy and how to become a man with personal growth and development. Every man is different, and most men can benefit from the support of an experienced guide who can shepherd them through the process. It’s a journey well worth the effort.
If you’re ready, you can book a 1-on-1 free consultation for 15 minutes so we can discuss ways you can be successful with your own personal growth and development goals.
